Huh. I'm just not sure.
So, I'm in the middle of making some decisions that will lead to big life transitions, and it looks like there's no real "right answer." I'm trying to decide where to go to school, and I'm a little frustrated that the programs that most excite me are in places that would leave me socially isolated.
Uhm- Black people invented snow!
{Not really, but I remember growing up that whenever I didn't like something some sage older Black person would appear and tell me a story that began with
,
So, I'm in the middle of making some decisions that will lead to big life transitions, and it looks like there's no real "right answer." I'm trying to decide where to go to school, and I'm a little frustrated that the programs that most excite me are in places that would leave me socially isolated.
Uhm- Black people invented snow!
{Not really, but I remember growing up that whenever I didn't like something some sage older Black person would appear and tell me a story that began with
,"Did you know that a Black man actually invented..."
I'm all for infusing racial pride into little Black children; God knows we need it, but there's a time and a place. "Yes, Little one, [cue music with windchimes] his name was Thornton Blaxton. He was a poor farmer from Mississippi, and even though he only had one eye due to a terrible accident during his birth in the slave quarters, he taught himself to read by candlelight. (Did I overhear that you weren't getting an A in your reading class?) Anyway, Thornton eventually managed to save up enough money to buy his freedom and the freedom of his family (Did I overhear that you didn't want to share your candy with your sister?). They moved into a house that Thornton bought and began to raise crops and animals.
Well, over time Thornton's eyesight began to dwindle even more, and he ultimately lost his sight. Crops weren't a problem, but how could Thornton take care of his animals? How could Thornton even find his animals if he couldn't see them? [Dramatic pause] Well, Thornton had an idea. He put a post in the middle of his corral, and tied ropes to it. And, at the end of each rope was one of his animals. But, how would he know which was which? It certainly would take Thornton all day to follow his ropes only to keep finding cows and chickens when all he wanted was a pig, so he came up with a brilliant idea! Thornton created different knots for each kind of animal, so when he went to the post, he could just feel for the kind of knot he wanted and then follow that rope out to the pig, or cow, or chicken, or whatever animal he wanted.
Well, one day, after hearing about Thornton's brilliance, some white people came to visit Thornton and asked him to teach them how to use his system. So, Thornton taught them how to tie all of his knots.
Well, one of the white men decided to bring his son, John. And Thornton worked with John for hours everyday teaching him how to tie all the different knots and then taking John out for ice cream. Well, years later, as times changed, John founded the Ku Klux Klan. And the knot that he taught all of his Klan members to use when lynching Black folks was "the ice cream knot" that he learned from Thornton.
I'm all for infusing racial pride into little Black children; God knows we need it, but there's a time and a place. "Yes, Little one, [cue music with windchimes] his name was Thornton Blaxton. He was a poor farmer from Mississippi, and even though he only had one eye due to a terrible accident during his birth in the slave quarters, he taught himself to read by candlelight. (Did I overhear that you weren't getting an A in your reading class?) Anyway, Thornton eventually managed to save up enough money to buy his freedom and the freedom of his family (Did I overhear that you didn't want to share your candy with your sister?). They moved into a house that Thornton bought and began to raise crops and animals.
Well, over time Thornton's eyesight began to dwindle even more, and he ultimately lost his sight. Crops weren't a problem, but how could Thornton take care of his animals? How could Thornton even find his animals if he couldn't see them? [Dramatic pause] Well, Thornton had an idea. He put a post in the middle of his corral, and tied ropes to it. And, at the end of each rope was one of his animals. But, how would he know which was which? It certainly would take Thornton all day to follow his ropes only to keep finding cows and chickens when all he wanted was a pig, so he came up with a brilliant idea! Thornton created different knots for each kind of animal, so when he went to the post, he could just feel for the kind of knot he wanted and then follow that rope out to the pig, or cow, or chicken, or whatever animal he wanted.
Well, one day, after hearing about Thornton's brilliance, some white people came to visit Thornton and asked him to teach them how to use his system. So, Thornton taught them how to tie all of his knots.Well, one of the white men decided to bring his son, John. And Thornton worked with John for hours everyday teaching him how to tie all the different knots and then taking John out for ice cream. Well, years later, as times changed, John founded the Ku Klux Klan. And the knot that he taught all of his Klan members to use when lynching Black folks was "the ice cream knot" that he learned from Thornton.
So, anytime you see a Black person strung up on a tree, know that it was Thornton Blaxton a Black man, who invented the noose.}So yeah- I'm stuck about my decision for school. I don't think that social isolation is the price I'm willing to pay for a "great education"; primarily because I can't learn much if I'm depressed and filled with ire for white people.
BUT!! The whole reason I started this blog was because I decided to start using my brain again, in an "If you build it, they will come" approach to claiming conversation partners in my life. Well, man! The program I just looked at had conversation partners like a mug!
City? Sux!
School? Sux!
Department? Gem!
I felt alive in ways that I hadn't in a long time; able to spend time with people who've carved out space in their lives to get paid for the thinking that they do. It was a refreshing treat to listen to long-winded and thoughtful answers to my questions, "Well, your question makes me think of three things...and I say all of that to help you understand the context in which I'm framing my response...certainly the quick answer to your question is ______, but what gets more to the heart of your question is... So, I would answer you question by saying... Also, you may want to consider... Oh! And, one quick thing I want to add..."
MMmmmm...home...
It was great to be with folks who could both talk and listen like that; folks who could take in the whole of my question and respond to it, rather than forcing me to break my questions down into bite-sized, pre-chewed, single-concept ideas. It was enlivening. But this gem of a program is stuck in a shitty town with few Black folks, on an unattractive campus with fewer Black folks, or Hispanics, some Asians- but that "model minority" bullshit doesn't set us up to be down like 4 flat tires like Black and Brown people are.
Anyway, this shit is hard to think through.
School? Sux!
Department? Gem!
I felt alive in ways that I hadn't in a long time; able to spend time with people who've carved out space in their lives to get paid for the thinking that they do. It was a refreshing treat to listen to long-winded and thoughtful answers to my questions, "Well, your question makes me think of three things...and I say all of that to help you understand the context in which I'm framing my response...certainly the quick answer to your question is ______, but what gets more to the heart of your question is... So, I would answer you question by saying... Also, you may want to consider... Oh! And, one quick thing I want to add..."
MMmmmm...home...
It was great to be with folks who could both talk and listen like that; folks who could take in the whole of my question and respond to it, rather than forcing me to break my questions down into bite-sized, pre-chewed, single-concept ideas. It was enlivening. But this gem of a program is stuck in a shitty town with few Black folks, on an unattractive campus with fewer Black folks, or Hispanics, some Asians- but that "model minority" bullshit doesn't set us up to be down like 4 flat tires like Black and Brown people are.
Anyway, this shit is hard to think through.
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