I Punched Myself In The Stomach Just Now.

Well, not just now, but recently enough that I still feel like throwing up. I didn't punch myself in the stomach on purpose, in fact I was really fucking shocked that it happened. It kinda knocked the wind out of me, but mostly it made me want to throw up. It’s 6:28 am, I’m in the airport, and I don’t get to NY until 11:30, and I can’t eat anything before my plane takes off, because I punched myself in the stomach.

Terrible.

It seemed innocent enough, I was tired of carrying my bag, so I got one of those carts with the handbrake. Push down it rolls, release and it stops. Well, I can be a brisk walker, and in my briskness I forgot that the handbrake violates the laws of inertia. Your cart will not slow down with you as process that a bathroom is ahead on the left. If you let go of the handbrake, it stops. It stops rather abruptly in fact.

If you’re not paying close attention you will walk, kinda fast, into a stationary object with a bar that comes right across your abdomen. I don’t ever remember someone being really pissed at me and punching me in my stomach. But, this shit makes me want to be nice to everyone I meet for the rest of my life, just in case. This shit is terrible.

Before that I had a security guard yell at me because I asked him if he was having a bad day. He was being really rude to an old woman who hadn’t flown since the new security measures had been implemented, and she was confused about a lot of things. He yelled at me because “I didn’t know him” and therefore couldn’t tell if he was frustrated or not. So, since he was already pissed, and now taking it out on me, I toyed with him.

“Well, I hope your day gets better.”

Fumimg words!!

“I’m just saying that I hope you have a good day.”

“Ma’am! Just take your bag and leave.”

“Oh, my bags still haven’t come out yet. If they had, I wouldn’t be standing here listening to you take out your frustrations.” (smile)

Fuming words!!

“Ok then, have a nice day!”

Fuming words!!

I told all of the folks in the security area to have a nice day. Some of them laughed. Some of them didn’t.

Before that, my cab forgot about me. I called for a cab to the train, and then planned to ride the train to the airport. I called several times and was told that he was on the way each time. Finally, I called back pissed, and demanded to know what they were going to do for me since this whole ordeal had taken nearly 30 minutes, and now it was too late for me to catch the train. Free ride to the airport, and the driver was the guy who “forgot” to pick me up. Ok.

After 10 minutes, I’d started walking. Not because I thought it would make a difference about time/convenience, but because I would have been pissed if I just sat in the house waiting. So, I walked ¾ mile at 5am through not necessarily the safest part of town, carrying my luggage over my shoulder.

The whole thing was almost laughable, which wasn’t lost on me. So, the guy finally arrives, and tells me that he forgot. He didn’t have an answer for why he never came after the subsequent calls, but I tell him that because of his dropping the ball, I now need to go straight to the airport, and they said that they would take care of it.

“No problem, I’ll take care of it for you. And, I’ll get you to the airport early. I’m really sorry.” he turns off his meter, and were off.

So, we ride to the airport at 80+ mph, and I decided that mistakes happen, so I would pay him the fare that I would have otherwise paid to get to the train plus a tip. So, $15 is better than nothing; he’s just a working stiff.

We pull up to my airline, and he says, “Okay, that’ll be $30.” WTF!?!?

“Normally, it would be $33, but I want to take care of the inconvenience.”

I ran him through the litany of inconveniences he caused me, including the need to get a ride all the way to the airport in the first place. $3, uhm- I had to tell him that I was doing my best not to curse him out.

So, I had to argue with him, and he finally agreed to a lower fare.

He got $10, I told him that I shouldn’t give him anything, and made him give me change from a $20. (ouch!)

Started with that, went to the friendly security guy, and then punched myself in the stomach. Somehow, I’m still in a pretty good mood. I haven’t succumbed to “having a bad day”. Could be my crush. Could be that a couple of shitty instances haven’t ground me down to the point that I’m starting to take it personal.

I think I’ll go get a croissan’wich.
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Fast forward to 1am. I had a pretty good day. I found a really good BBQ joint; found the apartment that I plan to live in for the next 12 months; wandered out to the edge of town and found what may become my favorite Polish restaurant; and went with a friend to grab a drink, where I met some cool-ass folks and got me some digits.

Not a bad day at all.